The audio-visual room was dark and cold. The staff-person of Chitragupta left me in the company of chills and anticipation, shut the door behind her and went about her work. Two minutes of silence ensued and then the screening began. The opening credits read as follows:

निर्माता- परमात्मा 

लेखक- ज़िन्दगी 

निर्देशक व मुख्य कलाकार- प्रेरणा 

प्रस्तुत करते है- 

"अलविदा"  

The opening scene was of an old woman lying on the bed, looking out of the window in her room with a contented smile. An old Hindi song could be heard faintly playing in the background. Soon the camera began zooming out from her face through the wooden window, then through the lush green groves surrounding her house and then high into the clouds.

The flashback began. Scenes from her eventful life kept flashing one after the other. Fun, mischief, play, fear, trauma, dreams, ambitions, competition, conflict, love, lust, joy, envy, heart-break, success, failure, travels, appreciation, laurels, criticism, defamation. She had it all. Some of it was faced and some of it was dodged. Sometimes she shone as a bright star and sometimes she receded into oblivion.

As this canvas of colours and hues unfolded on the screen, the reasons behind her contented smile at old age began to unravel in my mind.

Her journey was mostly defined by the struggles that she tried to choose mindfully. Although she faltered numerous times at this endeavour, she persisted and often took charge of her plane that used to slip into auto-pilot mode. In the words of Mark Manson- “A good life is a life of meaningful suffering”. And hence the content in her eyes!

Her kind and genuine attempts at meaningful closures helped her in tending to her bruises and wounds of unaccomplished dreams, humiliating rejections, painful heartbreaks and traumatic losses. And hence the peace emanating from her smile!

The camera zoomed in again through the clouds, the lush green groves, the wooden window and then to her glowing face. The last scene —- she closed her eyes and peacefully bade adieu to the world.

The courage that she showed in travelling inside her and in exploring and confronting as many psyches as possible made her a human being who could offer warmth and refuge to many. She was remembered as a dear friend first and then as a daughter, sister, girlfriend, wife, daughter-in-law, mother and so on. This reflected in the words of her obituary displayed on the screen at end:

“SHE WAS OUR SAFE SPACE”.

The AV room was dark again and I sat there crooning the song that played in the background in her room–

इक दिन बिक जाएगा
माटी के मोल
जग में रह जाएंगे
प्यारे तेरे बोल

दूजे के होंठों को
देकर अपने गीत
कोई निशानी छोड़
फिर दुनिया से डोल

इक दिन बिक जाएगा…